Forgiving & Forgetting Someone..

Forgivin & Forgetting someone is difficult. Especially when he has carved something so deep into your heart and soul. Something that has mattered alot in your life especially. Sigh.. To forgive and forget all his mistakes? TO FORGIVE ~~~~~~~~~~ To allow him for his past mistakes made, bear no grudges or hard feelings, accept his apologies and acknowledging that he's sincere and genuine is just so hard for me. TO FORGET ~~~~~~~~~ To put all those past behind, not raking abt it with negativity over and over again and letting go of all the feelings of hurt, anger and disappointment is just too difficult for me too. Well, everytime I dealt with him, I've this urge to be revengeful, anger will just suddenly rise.. I've become very defensive and protective of myself towards him and his words. His empty promises and misbehaviours. Countless disappointments.. That I've grown so numb and indifference to his existence. Now that he apologises to me for realising his mistake, is it so easy to just forgive him and forget all his past doings and mistakes? Some things are better left alone.. I'd rather not work on it. I've nothing against myself.. I should not let myself fall into your hands once again. When I'm with you, my moodiness will start setting in. I don't wish to see myself back there once again. My days of depression are over and I certainly pray that they stay out of my life. Since you dun bring me happiness but depressing memories, Please just let me go and stop trying to make things work.. It will never work because I will never be able to forgive and forget what you have done to me.. It's neverending miseries..